CantWaitToNap… @SheMightHave
Right behind you Joined April 2009-
Tweets268K
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Followers35K
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Following15K
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Likes222K
CantWaitToNap… retweeted
Which one of you fuckers taped over my vhs copy of the “Who’s the Boss?” series finale?
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CantWaitToNap… retweeted
Still can’t find the Go Fish table at this casino.
CantWaitToNap… retweeted
Think my neighbors are having some sort of wind chime war.
CantWaitToNap… retweeted
You don’t need to explain yourself if you carry a chainsaw.
CantWaitToNap… retweeted
Nudes from Europe are simply more tasteful.
CantWaitToNap… retweeted
Vacation coming up and I’m as excited as JD Vance with an 8 ball in a Pottery Barn.
CantWaitToNap… retweeted
HR is giving me a hard time because I’ve been starting all my work emails with “Dearly Beloved”.
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Seven wives and no alcohol? No thanks Mormons.
CantWaitToNap… retweeted
I did say I would never stop loving you, but that was before you made forever feel like a life sentence.
CantWaitToNap… retweeted
Legend says that if Sam Elliot shaves off his mustache, he becomes a mere mortal.
CantWaitToNap… retweeted
"I can do that!" Me, everytime I watch the Olympics.
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A rabid raccoon might be imposing but have you ever encountered an angry beaver?
CantWaitToNap… retweeted
Find yourself someone who makes your bad days good and your good days better.
CantWaitToNap… retweeted
My 23andMe results came back and it turns out I’m 15% Irish, 15% Italian and 70% Dickish
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